Fun With Email

So I've been having an email back and forth all day with this totally hot girl from aristocracy school. I had a few interactions with her during our co-education, but nothing beyond casual conversation. Today, she emailed me out of the blue, asking for advice on an arcane topic she remembered I knew something about. She completely fits the mold of girls I find attractive: brunette, brown eyes, and some other unmentionables (see past four girls with whom I've some sort of extended relationship: two Indians, that Serbian chick, ex-girlfriend of five years, my mom), and I'd be so laid if not for the 3500 fucking miles between us. Damn you, distance! Anyway, I'm pretty sure she has no idea that I now live at, approximately, the furthest point in the continental United States. No matter, I'll maintain this charade for an extended period, until it gets to an awkward and misleading point, at such time I'll cease all communication and act the total ass.

Right now, life kind of feels like it must for the Refugee, a constant groinkick of missed opportunity and shady behavior.